AN 9:17 Families

Many people are concerned about how to act around monks. This sutta from the Anguttara Nikaya (Numerical Discourses) explains good behaviour on the part of lay disciples. We may not have monks visit our homes, but we can still apply the principles to our interactions with monastics.

“Mendicants, visiting a family with nine factors is not worthwhile, or if you’ve already arrived, sitting down is not worthwhile. What nine?

  1. They don’t politely rise.
  2. They don’t politely bow.
  3. They don’t politely offer a seat.
  4. They hide what they have.
  5. Even when they have much they give little.
  6. Even when they have refined things they give coarse things.
  7. They give carelessly, not carefully.
  8. They don’t sit nearby to listen to the teachings.
  9. When you’re speaking, they don’t listen well.

Visiting a family with these nine factors is not worthwhile, or if you’ve already arrived, sitting down is not worthwhile.

Visiting a family with nine factors is worthwhile, or if you’ve already arrived, sitting down is worthwhile. What nine?

  1. They politely rise.
  2. They politely bow.
  3. They politely offer a seat.
  4. They don’t hide what they have.
  5. When they have much they give much.
  6. When they have refined things they give refined things.
  7. They give carefully, not carelessly.
  8. They sit nearby to listen to the teachings.
  9. When you’re speaking, they listen well.

Visiting a family with these nine factors is worthwhile, or if you’ve already arrived, sitting down is worthwhile.”

Based on a translation for SuttaCentral by Bhikkhu Sujato, 2018. Dedicated to the public domain via Creative Commons Zero (CC0).

Index

9 Buddha Qualities, abandon suffering, aggregates~khanda, alcohol, anger, animal world, anuttaropurisadammasarati quality, araham quality, Aṅgulimāla Arahant, bad association, bhagava quality, buddhanussati meditation, Buddhism, Buddhist, Buddhist etiquette, chanting, Chattamanavaka Gatha, compassion, confidence~saddhā, courage, craving, Culla Kammavibhanga Sutta, death, Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta, dharma classes near me, Enlightenment, evil deeds, first noble truth, Four Noble Truths, friendship, ghost world, giving~dāna, good actions, gratitude, greed, guided meditation, heaven, ignorance, impermanence~anicca, jataka, jealousy, karma, Katina, Katina Clothing, kids dhamma school, killing, life of Buddha, Life of Buddha with English Subtitles, Load Buddha, lokavidu quality, losing loved ones, loving-kindness~mettā, lying, Maha Satipatthana Sutta, Mangala Sutta, marks of a great man, meditation, merit~puññā, Mihintale, mindfulness~sati, Mora Paritta, Mundane Right View, nibbāna, Noble Eightfold Path, noble truth of suffering, non-attachment, Offering Katina Robes, online dhamma school, ordination, origin of suffering, parents, paritta, patience, pilgrimage, practice, precepts, psychic powers, pujas, Pāli, rains retreat, Rainy season, rare human birth, Ratana Sutta, respect, right speech, right view, sacred places, Sakka God, sammasambuddho quality, samsara, Sangha, Second Noble Truth, sexual misconduct, similes, Sri Lanka, Story of Buddha, stress, Suprime Buddha, Sāriputta Arahant, Taking advice, Third Noble Truth, Triple Gems, uposatha, Vas Season, Venerable Maha Moggalana, Vesak, vijjacaranasampanno quality, virtue~sīla, wisdom, Work, worldly conditions, wrong view